... that I don't like to hear.
People don't seem to understand this, regardless of how much I say them. These are words that people rarely, if ever, truly mean.
I think the intentions behind promises are usually genuine, but guarantees of this sort, regardless of the guises under which they are put forth, are futile at best, deluded at worst. No one can truly make a promise that the know they will keep. People change, circumstances change, the world changes around us and promises are designed to be forever.
These words, to me, are promises light. You simply cannot speak definitively about things that will never happen or will continue to happen until the end of time. It sets unrealistic expectations on ourselves and gives other people unrealistic views of what we are each capable of.
No one can make guarantees of that sort, try though we may, wish though we may, it's simply not possible, but delusions like this are ingrained. We think we can make enough of an effort to succeed, inevitably disappointing people in the long run.
Sorry:
This is probably the one I hate the most, but I, myself, am guilty of using it from time to time.
I cannot believe that this is ever truly genuine. You screw up, OWN IT, then take measures to make up to the person you wronged and figure out a way to ensure it won't happen again. Sorry, in and of itself, is meaningless. I would prefer, if someone owes me an apology that they make the effort to either atone or to apologize genuinely. Sorry just feels like a cop-out.
It's like with the Spawn, he'll do the same obnoxious or inappropriate thing over and over and over again and dismiss it with "I'm sorry" or (as time progresses) "I'm really really really sorry, Mama." This is not good enough for me, not just as a mother, but as a person. If you were truly repentant, if you were really apologetic,
this would not keep happening.
******
Maybe it's just me, but these words always rub me the wrong way. I hear them said to others and I roll my eyes, but when they are directed at me I usually launch into a tirade about why not to use those words to me, or really at all if you can possibly avoid it.
Don't get me wrong, I'm willing to commit to a whole heck of a lot of things and, for the most part, my loyalty to those things knows no bounds, but I refuse to commit to forever or to make promises that I know are potentially going to hurt someone if they get broken.
Don't make me promises. Don't tell me forever (for good or bad, for never or always). And if you've hurt me, just see to it that it doesn't happen again.
Meaningless words will only serve to drive me further away.
~FG };^>
